I wrote this last night as the death toll in this country approaches 160,000 and debated whether or not I was going to post it but I decided that the whole purpose of this blog is to write honestly about what I feel – so here it is.
Why you are not welcome in my home.
That’s a pretty harsh statement. I admit that. But it’s also a true statement. I really don’t want any visitors right now. Don’t get me wrong. I am not the next Ted Kaczynski (the ‘Unabomber’) nor am I antisocial. I like people – let me qualify that – I like most people. I enjoy entertaining and having engaging conversations with all kinds of different people. So why aren’t you welcome in my house?
I guess the short version is that I simply don’t trust you based upon what I witness on a daily basis. I really hate to say that but it’s true. There is after all a pandemic going on (currently approaching 160,000 American fatalities) and the fact is that my life is potentially in your hands. Some of you say that you are following CDC guidelines and others of you obviously continue to think this is all still a big hoax. But based upon what I see when driving around and what is posted on social media, I’m not convinced that I am willing to take the risk to put my life in your hands.
I go to Home Depot because I need supplies for all of the remodeling I’m doing around my house. ( And yes I’m masked and well-armed with hand sanitizer) Although things have improved and most people are wearing masks, there are still the ones who have not figured out that the nasal passages are just as connected to the lungs as the mouth, so wearing a mask solely over your mouth when your nose is exposed is a pointless exercise. I try to stay away from those people. They either flunked biology or are obviously not taking this seriously.
I sometimes drive down main street on my way home and see people crowded around the ice cream stores or various other venues and while some may be masked, some are not and there certainly isn’t any social distancing taking place. I can get my ice cream at the store – thank you very much.
I talked to my daughter a couple of nights who was very frustrated. She and her mom are back in New York and taking this seriously, but she was frustrated by what she was seeing on social media with some of her friends and family. They all espouse the use of masks and the need to take this seriously and yet they post pictures of themselves on social media out with their friends, no masks in sight and no social distancing going on. Jordan is a pre-med student. She takes this seriously and it frustrates the hell out of her. I can only encourage her to continue to do the right thing.
It’s almost as if people seem to think that if you’re with your friends or family that it’s an automatic ‘safe zone.’ I’m not sure that the virus really understands that concept. It’s an interesting mindset. On a battlefield, the lives of everyone around you depend upon your actions. I am having a very difficult time understanding why this is any different.
If people were in a firefight and real bullets were flying, I’m sure everyone would take the appropriate precautions – body armor, stay low to the ground, take cover when possible, etc. – but I doubt seriously people would feel safe to just standup and strip off their body armor if they were joined by their buddies on the battlefield. Oh, ‘we’re friends, so no bullets can get us now’. Everyone would probably agree that is an absurd concept. And while the battle we’re in doesn’t involve bullets per se, it does involve microscopic projectiles hell bent on wreaking havoc on anyone they can infect.
There are some things you can control and some things you can’t. I know that I can pretty much control who comes into my house and who I associate with and when. So, for the foreseeable future, I won’t be accepting any company in my house nor will I be doing any socializing elsewhere. I go to the grocery because I need to eat. I go to Home Depot because I am working on my house. I don’t go to restaurants or anywhere where there are large concentrations of people. Is that unfortunate – yes! Is it manageable – yes!
I am fortunate in that I am not one of those people who must be around people. I don’t mind being by myself. I have lots of books to read, projects to do, miles to log on my bicycle, and thinking about trips I may take when this is all over. My only daughter is currently in New York and I have no grandkids so I understand that my situation is somewhat unique for someone my age. That said, this disease is extremely contagious, is totally non-discriminatory, and really doesn’t care if you’re a friend, relative or foe.
I’m sure there are those that think I’m being paranoid but I prefer to think of it as being cautious and prudent. I also view it as simply trying to do my small part to get this monster under control. I heard someone once say, “We all have to die sometime, but I am going to do everything in my power to avoid dying by ‘stupid’”.
The irony is that the more I stay away from everyone else, the safer everyone else is. If they get the virus, they won’t be getting it from me. I fully understand that there is still a chance I may get the coronavirus. Perhaps I lingered too long at Home Depot or the grocery store. Who knows? It’s possible. But I understand math and science and I understand the more I can stack the odds in my favor, the higher the probability that I’ll be around to see Jordan graduate, get married, have kids, etc. And the more precautions I take, the safer everyone around me is as well.
So, until this is over or at least contained, you are not welcome in my house nor will I be visiting you. No hard feelings. We’ll get together on the other side. I look forward to being able to once again roll out the welcome mat but, for now, it’s rolled up and tucked away in the garage. Be safe out there.